A Slight Degree of Difference
by xcd
Summary: Even geniuses have questions. Even Atheists have beliefs. Even Alchemists question the principles that their world revolves in. Parental! RoyEd
1. Persistence

**Summary: **Even geniuses have questions. Even Atheists have beliefs. Even Alchemists question the principles that their world revolves in. Parental! Roy/Ed

**Pairing/s: **Parental! Roy/Ed

**Warnings: **None

**Author's Note: **First story updated. This is a parental fic NOT yaoi. As it says in my profile (Visit if you have the time) I do not write yaoi unless requested…or at least if I picture Ed as a girl but let him remain as a guy in the story.

**Important! **This is not a one-shot. It has 3 parts in it. It's short, I know but it will be longer in the succeeding chapters

**Disclaimer: **No one in their right minds would create a fanfic if they owned the damn series itself…

**A Slight Degree of Difference**

**Chapter 1**

_Persistence_

"Colonel…Do you believe in equivalent exchange?"

Words slipped out of the blonde icily and felt quite natural without notice. This question came out all of a sudden from a certain subordinate of his while bringing in the said report The blonde in front of him stood firm and his expression completely unreadable. The golden bangs that covered Edward Elric's eyes helped a lot in adding the mystery as to what Edward was truly feeling.

Roy Mustang didn't know exactly how he would, no, _should _reply to the question that was asked. The boy in front of him was not your ordinary type of boy. He would've given absolutely anything to have one in front of him instead of having to answer the question of a prodigy…

Absolutely anything to be with someone within the same room than having Edward Elric, _the _Fullmetal alchemist, ask his state of belief.

"What is this all about, Fullmetal?" he tries to counter. Mustang began with a sigh before saying out loud the sentence, trying to indicate that he was tired and that he had no time for this. Too bad that Edward Elric did not care about his wellbeing.

"Do you believe in equivalent exchange?" Edward repeats. The tone, a bit changed. It held an air of challenge and sounded as if it was important to hear what he had to say, as if it would help to find the Philosopher's Stone.

"Is that a trick question? Perhaps you should consider rephrasing your question there, shorty."

"Do you believe in equivalent exchange?" the shorter of the two pressed on. He was unaffected by the "shorty" word. He didn't even flinch nor did he tighten his fist. No traces of suppressed anger could be seen.

"Honestly…I believe you should leave. I have absolutely no time for mind games today, Fullmetal. Supposing that I did believe in it, you wouldn't get the reason why, anyways."

After that, silence…

Deafening, uncomfortable silence…

A few seconds after the statement had been made, sounds of boots slowly echoed within the office, making its way to the door…

Another sound came. This one, a sound of door closing behind a person. This one, a sound of a door closing in front of a person. This one, a sound of a door closing between two persons.

The last one was the sound of a tiny resilient voice amidst the silence.

_Do you believe in equivalent exchange?_

**Author's note:**

Reviews and Criticisms are always welcome. Flames are also welcome and are not discouraged. So whatever you want to say, just say it because I'm not going to complain but that won't stop me from updating. Review (or flame me) if you have the time. If you don't then, oh well… I guess not everyone is satisfied


	2. Back to the mainstream

**Summary: **Even geniuses have questions. Even Atheists have beliefs. Even Alchemists question the principles that their world revolves in. Parental! Roy/Ed

**Pairing/s: **Parental! Roy/Ed

**Warning:** None

**Author's Note: **Here's the 2nd installment. So far, we have no warnings yet. I figured that since this _is _my first fic updated I decided to go a little easy on the language. And how do I show that? Why, by not using swear words as I usually do, of course. By the way, this 2nd chapter is an in-between chapter. I did it because I promised 3 chapters and I don't want to break that. No action going on so far. Even Mustang is a little frozen…

**Important! **None

**Disclaimer: **No one in their right minds would create a fanfic if they owned the damn series itself…

**A Slight Degree of Difference**

**Chapter 2**

_Back to the mainstream_

Roy Mustang was silent. His head slightly bent down to look upon the papers that he was signing and for the first time in his whole career, he was not complaining nor was he giving hints of taking a break before finishing. He just sat there, continually scribbling his signature and his expression was unreadable.

No one knows why he acted this way for a couple of days. No one even knows why he kept asking everyone a peculiar question, regardless if they are superior or a subordinate. Always, always before a report or before an important news or even as simple as asking him if he wants to get his lunch with them, he'd always ask the same question and wait for an answer. If no answer comes, he'll continue his work and when that person asks him what the question was for, he'd just shrug it off.

Even his subordinates, who almost knew every weird habit of the Colonel, found it to be very confusing yet interesting at the same time.

At first, they actually thought that Roy was thinking about human transmutation once again. It hasn't been long since Maes Hughes, Roy's confidant, had died. Everyone knows how depressed the man has become ever since then. Trying to bring back the family man back to life might not be so farfetched but Riza contradicted.

She had heard Roy swear before Maes' grave that he will be fuehrer and that he will not let anything stop him from reaching this goal. If there was something Riza knew about Roy without any doubt it was the fact that he never went against his promises. He was a man who sticks to his own words.

He wasn't stupid enough to try human transmutation knowing how unsuccessful it could be, as given witness to by Edward Elric.

Why then had he been asking them…?

_Do you believe in equivalent exchange?_

Such questions were not usually heard from that certain Colonel. They had often wondered whether this was another side-effect Mustang had from thinking too much about the Ishbal war and the part he had played in its duration. No one really answered him with a reason. They had assumed that it was a simple yes and no answer and that if they answered one of the two options, it didn't really need further explanations.

Somehow, a few weeks passed and everything went back to normal. The Colonel stopped asking that question. He went back to his old procrastinating days and this time, no one complained.

Well, who _would _complain?

If we were talking in terms of the onyx-eyed man who usually kept a poker face up front and was as lazy as hell, then I suppose a lot would complain. However, for his subordinates they liked him better when he was like that. Ok, maybe he can try to work past 4 pm at least. _Then, _they'd like him more.

**Author's Note:**

Again, I managed to squeeze in a short chapter. Although I did promise that it'll be longer, looks like I can't simply because the 3rd chapter is where I put most of my efforts in. Good news? I stuck to my word that this story _will _have 3 chapters in it. Well, to those who wants to review, go right ahead coz no ones going to stop you. To those who wants to offer me flames, I just want to say an advanced thanks because then I'd be able to cook my smores…

Did I mention that this chapter is extremely short?

Thanks, I just wanted to make sure.


	3. Do you believe in Equivalent Exchange 1

**Summary: **Even geniuses have questions. Even Atheists have beliefs. Even Alchemists question the principles that their world revolves in. Parental! Roy/Ed

**Pairing/s: **Parental! Roy/Ed

**Warning:** None

**Author's Note: **Hey there people! Long time no see. Surprise, surprise…I'm back. Yah, I know it's been long since I updated but, funny story actually. While I was browsing around my files looking for the 3rd AND last chapter of this fic to upload I found that not only had it been as hard as shit to find it but it also got DELETED. Anyone who loves to write will know how FRUSTRATING it is when a completed story gets deleted W/O your knowing. So, yeah…I'm back and now ANYONE who'd like to put this up in a C2, knock yourselves out!

And before anything else…I like to extend my thanks to those who stood by this fic no matter how short it is (I'm just buying time here, really. Who knows? You guys might find this last chapter a poor excuse of a story). To all those who read this and to those who commented, thank you SO MUCH. And I DIDN'T receive any flames!! (It was either you guys liked this story or the flamers out there found this too lame that it wasn't even WORTH the flame they were about to give.)

**Important! **Btw…most writers I know usually rewrite a deleted/missing story by memory and more often than not, the stories contain almost the same content as the last one (Although not word for word, but you get the idea). Mine would be a bit different though. I didn't write this by memory and the original plot for the ending is actually different here (I got lazy trying to rewrite what happened in the deleted/missing story so I came up with this instead oO).

AND ANOTHER THING! (I'm beginning to think the notes would be longer than the story itself. _No shit_)

I want you to take note that the scene in this last chapter is like an alternative for a certain episode in the story. I won't give too much detail here as you might figure out what will be going on but this all happens after Ed and Al finally obtained the philosopher's stone. And this "New" ending was pretty hard for me to write since it's very hard to have Ed and Roy AT the same room and interact normally with each other (That is, no yelling, no fighting, no short comments…etc..) W/O making them OOC.

Ok…Well, that's enough of my pointless babbling…On with the story, yes??

**Disclaimer: **No one in their right minds would create a fanfics if they owned the damn series itself…

**A Slight Degree of Difference**

**Chapter 2**

_Do You Believe in Equivalent Exchange?_

_Edward Elric and Roy Mustang never got along well with each other_.

This is a big overstatement. They _do _get along. They just never stick around with each other long enough to understand that they both have too much in common for their own good. Edward was always the kind of person you never want to mess with. He was short-tempered, aggressive, stubborn and he was too damn independent most of the times…

Too independent to accept any kind of help because he thinks it's a sign of weakness.

And this is why both of them can never see eye-to-eye most of the times. Roy always looked out for them, gave them top secret information, protected them and, at a safe distance, _tried _to make them understand that they're not alone and that he and his crew and all the others would be ready to give a helping hand if ever they needed it. But Edward was stubborn. He _didn't _want help. Instead, he gets himself into all kinds of trouble, goes face-to-face with the most wanted criminals and practically stares at death in the eye…

Always giving but never the one to receive anything…

And all that trouble just to get his little brother's normal body back. ..

It unnerves Roy when the young prodigy would go head-on to the thick of the action and just mindlessly put his life on the line without asking for any help. He wouldn't be surprised if Edward would throw himself in front of an incoming truck should anyone tell him it was the only way to get the philosopher's stone (A/N: Fat chance that he'll believe that…).

It doesn't even matter if you berate Edward. Whatever goes into the ear of the alchemist comes out on the other ear and never sticks to his brain. As far as manners goes, Fullmetal wasn't exactly the best example for that too but ethics is definitely something the prodigy was full of. At a very young age, Edward knows fully well how most of the Alchemic principles work.

"Although I'd probably know how equivalent exchange works too, had I tried to bring back…those people…" he muttered, his lips almost touching the rim of the cup of coffee he held in his left hand. After he had drained what was left of the content of the cup, he set aside the empty mug and continued checking and re-checking every paper on hand. He wasn't in any rush to finish reading those papers, though. He had plenty of time to finish them in the confines of his own home office.

Somehow he felt more comfortable doing his paperwork here in his own house than in his office. The office felt too cramped and ever since his subordinates got transferred to different places, work just wasn't the same. He let out a small sigh, stretching his arms above his head for a bit. A lot of things have happened over the course of the week. The Elrics' sudden disappearance, the complete destruction of Lior, the death of scar, his subordinates' order for transferring to another unit and, not to mention, the proof that their Fuhrer might be a homunculus and all this Chimera business….

This was all too much for his poor, over-worked brain.

He closed his eyes for a moment, trying to find a moment of peace amidst all the chaos and dangerous twists that seem to be unfolding continuously without rest. Just as when he was in-synch with his much needed moment of silence, the door bell rang, loudly and clearly announcing the presence of some person waiting outside.

He left the comforts of his cozy chair after letting out strings of swear words. _This is definitely not the best day of my God-forsaken life…_

"I'm coming!" he yelled out.

As he reached the front door and turned the knob to open the only hindrance there was between him and that person, his heartbeat suddenly sped-up as if nervous to know who that was. Part of him was trying to convince his mind not to open the door as this could lead to yet _another _bad news but the other part of him was screaming out the words as audibly as it can in his partly exhausted state…

_THIS.IS.IMPORTANT!_

And right at the moment that he had finally opened that door and _saw _who was standing in front of him he knew that it both sides could've been right after all.

"Fullmetal?"

That was all he could manage to say as he was finally able to take in the sight of his bedraggled subordinate. _Soaking and exhausted, _were the words that entered his mind to describe the current state of _the _Fullmetal Alchemist.

_Fullmetal…as in Edward Elric…the ever-stubborn Edward…the youngest boy to have ever passed the state alchemist exam…Ed who, as memory serves, hated me with every fiber of the boy's being…_

_Standing in front of me _and _in front of the door to my house! _My _house!! _(A/N: I'm not trying to make him sound _fanatic _about Ed but Ed hates him so much. Imagine his surprise when he sees Edward standing on his doorstep at that ungodly hour!)

"erm….Mustang? You still there?" Edward had said, snapping his flesh fingers in front of his eyes to get his attention.

"Uh….yes…yes, Fullmetal. I'm still here."

"So are you going to just let me stand over here or are you going to invite me inside your…." A pause as Ed tilted his head to the side to look at the view that would've been much clearer if Mustang wasn't blocking the doorway "inside your house."

Knowing his reputation, he could sense that Ed had just checked if he had someone with him tonight, or to be more specific, _some woman _to keep him company.

"I can assure you that there is no one else in this house but me and yes…of course you can come in." he replied as he moved aside to let Edward pass.

Grime and dust merged with his clean, white carpet the moment Ed's boots stepped on it. If this were some other guy, he would've made sure that that person would get an earful of lessons regarding manners. There was a nagging feeling at the back of his mind that this was an important moment…

_Manners can wait…_

As Ed had already flopped down Roy's dark brown couch without Roy's permission whatsoever, he too had allowed himself to settle down into a smaller couch. They spent a few seconds in silence, Roy being not too experienced on how to deal with quiet moments with a boisterous person such as Edward. Sure, he can strike up good topics with women but it was fairly easy to create conversation with those who tolerate nonsense and fantasy talks.

_This _, however, is very different. He never knew how to speak to Edward without letting out a height-related tease (or joke, as he likes to call it).

_You can always try, Mustang. Who knows?_

"So…do you want coffee or something?" he said out of the blue, shattering the established silence within the room.

"No, no coffee for me…thanks for the offer though, bastard." Edward replied casually.

Ignoring the fact that Ed still called him bastard…did he just say "Thanks for the offer"? _Dear lord, I must be more exhausted than I thought I was!_

"Nice place you got here. A little small for someone who has a high paying job but it looks nice, nonetheless."

"Thanks. I'm still a single man so this is big enough for me. If anything, I still say this is bigger than what I need."

Ed gave a little snort before commenting "For such a womanizer like yourself, I'm surprised you still haven't got yourself a wife. What with the late night activities Havoc and the others are talking about, I expected that you had at least _one _kid."

He gave out a little laugh before turning back to his usual serious face that was often adorned with a frown "Seriously though…what did you come here for? We both know you can't stand me, let alone be in the same room with me and I highly doubt that you came here just to talk about my love life and my night activities."

"Actually…" Ed's eyes wandered around the room for a bit until it came to rest upon a picture atop the fireplace. Slowly, he got up and walked towards it. "I wasn't even thinking of coming here in the first place."

"And yet here you are…" said Roy as he watched the younger alchemist pick up the picture frame. It was the picture frame that held an old photograph of him when he was little, together with his family. He can clearly see how Edward's eyes burned with curiosity "Do you even want to know?"

"Indulge me" came the immediate reply

"That was taken way back when I was 6 years old. That woman at my left side is my mother, behind me is my father, to my right is my older brother, the eldest of the family and next to him is my second older brother. He was the middle child."

"So, there were 3 of you. The eldest brother looks nothing like you but the middle one…you two look almost identical."

"Yeah…David, that's the name of our eldest, had taken after the looks of our father and, unfortunately, he had also seemingly inherited our father's obsession for power, wealth and control over people. James, however, had mother's best qualities. He was warm and friendly. Generally, he was kind to people and he rarely showed any signs of aggressiveness whenever he had to compete for something he wanted or when he doesn't get the thing that he wants so badly. People can easily gravitate to his personality."

"Aside from mother, he was the only person in the family with whom I can confide my personal problems with. We were as "thick as thieves", as they would say and we would normally defend one another whenever father berated one of us."

"And this James…what happened to him? Where does he live now?"

"Drowned during a family vacation. He died trying to save a family member's life. I daresay he's probably on the other side."

"Good people _do _die young."

Ed didn't want to know whose life James Mustang had tried to save that unfortunate day. He can notice it. Either it was because Ed didn't want to force guilt in or he simply didn't want to lengthen the story and stay any longer than necessary. As Ed put down the frame, Roy cannot help but to glance at the smiling face of his second older brother.

"Listen, Mustang…" Edward began as he finally settled down the couch once more. Mustang didn't look at him directly but Ed knew that his CO was listening.

"You'd be surprised to know that a part of me is actually glad that you told me at least a part of your life."

"And I'm surprised that neither of us had beaten each other to a pulp up to this point."

"I'm serious, bastard." A glare sent towards Mustang from Ed brought a sense of familiarity from the old environment they both used to exist in.

"Alright, alright…continue."

"I'll admit. You were a lot of help to me and Al and I never gave you back the proper gratitude you needed after all the leads you gave me, no matter how little they were. Don't get the wrong idea. I think you're still a bastard and _that _will never change. Even if I'm wiped off the face of the earth, I will not reel back to the past and think of you as a good memory…"

"Same here."

"And please, spare me from any life stories you have. I'm not here to get to know you better. I _don't want _to know you better because then I'd be regretting how we never got to get along well and that would pull me back from my initial obligations to my little brother."

"So what _are _you here for, Edward?"

"I think it was a month ago when I asked you if you believed in Equivalent exchange. You didn't answer me. And now, I want to know. I've given you over a month to sleep on it and think up of an answer. If you can answer me decently enough, I'll tell you what I originally came here for."

"Common ground." He replied almost immediately as he faced Ed. Onyx eyes locked with the gaze of Golden orbs.

"What?"

"It's a common ground. Equivalent exchange had already been an established principle in the alchemic world. A lot of alchemists have based their lives entirely on this principle. You are an excellent example of this."

"What are you trying to say? That equivalent exchange is some kind of rubbish principle?" Ed snapped back.

"I never said that, Fullmetal, nor was I trying to say it. You've lived your whole life holding on to this principle. To say that it was nothing but rubbish would certainly hurt your pride but I have to be honest here. You asked me if I believed in "Equivalent exchange" and I would have to say that the answer is yes. Yes I do believe in it but _only _when it involves alchemy."

When Ed didn't say anything, he continued…

"Equivalent exchange is just like any other principle. There are only certain places where you can apply such a principle. In alchemy, for example. We both know alchemists cannot create something out of nothing. We've got to have something that has an equal composition to be able to create the alchemical reaction we need. The same goes for our job. If you do nothing, then you don't get anything. But in life…It's different."

"How so?"

"Let me ask you something. If a man saves your life once, does that mean that you are indebted to this man for the rest of your life?"

"No" Ed tentatively answered.

"If you save a person, do you expect that person to give you a reward in exchange for your saving act?"

"No."

"If someone with a kind heart was to exchange his life to bring back a ruthless murderer….is that equivalent exchange?"

"No" he answered for the last time.

"Then clearly, equivalent exchange is not what you think it is. As a principle, there are only certain moments to which it can work according to what we all want. In the case of Trisha Elric" Ed visibly flinched at the mention of her mother's name "Can you honestly say that the loss of your brother's body and of your arm and your leg was worth the sacrifice in exchange for something that was brought back that was not even close to a human?"

Ed didn't answer. And yet, his subordinate's silence was all he needed for a response. Edward didn't want to say it out loud, but Roy knew that the answer would be "No."

_No_, the suffering they had gone through was _not _worth it.

_No, _the thing that they brought back was _not _an equivalent exchange.

"It wasn't fair right? It just wasn't worth the sacrifice…" Roy said, to which Ed had once again flinched as if invisible knives just stabbed him over and over again.

Before Ed could answer back, he added "It wasn't worth the sacrifice…but it was worth a try."

"It was worth a try." The shorter of the two repeated and, at the same time, agreed to what Roy had said.

"Was that answer acceptable enough?"

"It is, definitely not the answer I thought you would give, but that's good enough for me."

This time, it was Roy's turn to not let curiosity get the best of him. He didn't want to go any further so he kept his mouth shut to prevent himself from asking Fullmetal exactly what kind of answer the blonde was expecting from him.

"Well, you said if I gave you an acceptable answer, you'd tell me why you came here. Now that I've answered your question, I think it's about time for you to answer _my_ question."

"I came here because I just wanted to tell you that we did it." Ed said as he straightened up and locked his eyes with the Flame alchemist. "We finally got the Philosopher's stone."

**Author's note:**

A cliffhanger is an evil form of practice, isn't it? SLIGHT CHANGE OF PLANS!!! I've had you guys waiting for so long so I decided to give you the part A of chapter 3. This one is a bit longer, don't you agree? As always, all of y'all are free to comment AND flame whenever you want.

And I don't want to sound like an evil-review-hogging-bastard but……

I PROMISE a faster update if I get 6 reviews!!! (Why do I get the feeling that no one will do that?)


	4. Do you believe in Equivalent Exchange 2

**Summary: **Even geniuses have questions. Even Atheists have beliefs. Even Alchemists question the principles that their world revolves in. Parental! Roy/Ed

**Pairing/s: **Parental! Roy/Ed

**Warning: **Obscene Language

**Author's Note: **Alright. Here's the 2nd part to the 3rd chapter. This will also be the last chapter to this story. I know that this is really, really late and I apologize for the huge delay. This is not thoroughly edited, but rest assured that I _will _edit this later on. Enjoy.

**Important! **As I have said before, this story is like an alternate scene in reference to Roy and Ed's "Goodbye" scene.

Thank you for those who reviewed, by the way! I highly appreciated the praises and the comments. As you can see, I have yet to encounter a flame but I'm keeping my fingers crossed at this point.

**Disclaimer: **No one in their right minds would create a fanfic if they owned the damn series itself…

* * *

**A Slight Degree of Difference**

**Chapter 3 (part 2)**

_Do You Believe in Equivalent Exchange?_

_This time, it was Roy's turn to not let curiosity get the best of him. He didn't want to go any further so he kept his mouth shut to prevent himself from asking Fullmetal exactly what kind of answer the blonde was expecting from him._

"_Well, you said if I gave you an acceptable answer, you'd tell me why you came here. Now that I've answered your question, I think it's about time for you to answer __my__ question."_

"_I came here because I just wanted to tell you that we did it." Ed said as he straightened up and locked his eyes with the Flame alchemist. "We finally got the Philosopher's stone."_

_

* * *

  
_

There was a pregnant pause after that. Roy didn't know what to say. A part of him was thinking that Fullmetal was just joking around but then again, considering Edward Elric's demeanor towards him, you don't just drop by Roy Mustang's house and joke about finding something that everyone _believed _to be practically impossible to find.

Truth be told, he wasn't _that _shocked that Ed had found the stone after years of search. Eventually, with Edward's talented brain and hard work, he just knew that the prodigy would actually be the one to discover how to make the philosopher's stone. What _did _shock him though was the circumstance in which Edward had brought up the subject. He had always imagined the scenario to be more like this: Ed will come bursting into Roy's office, pull out his state alchemist watch, slam it down the table, and say "I finally found it! Now, I don't need to be some dog that you can order and drag around whenever you want to. Goodbye, Colonel Bastard!"

That scene seemed a lot more plausible to him, not to mention that Roy would have preferred that one over this scenario any day. It was normal to see Ed lose his temper over the simplest things and much easier to see him act so childishly. It would work to Roy's advantage, too, because inside his office his emotions were practically inscrutable. He would have been able to keep everything strictly professional, and would have looked at it as nothing more than a long and arduous mission that had finally come to an end. When it came to the time that Ed had to leave, he could have been able to simply dismiss Ed and think nothing of it.

But this...this was the thin line between business and personal reasons, because Edward Elric did not talk to Roy Mustang unless it was in his office under Roy's orders.

_

* * *

  
_

"Hey, bastard? Colonel? Colonel Mustang!!" Ed yelled out of frustration. The man had seemed to forgotten that he was still inside the house.

"What?" Roy said in a voice that sounded slightly annoyed.

"Geez…and here I thought you suddenly stopped breathing and died."

"I'm afraid that's not going to happen anytime soon, even though I know you wish for it with as much fervor as you have for your brother."

There was a slight tone of banter in Roy's voice, but Ed didn't have much time to contemplate that as Roy stood up and made his way to the kitchen. When he came back to the living room, he had a bottle of vodka and a small drinking glass with him.

"You really should stop drinking yourself to death," Ed murmured, "not that I'm complaining, of course." He added, a lot more loudly this time.

Roy gave out a small scoff of amusement before setting down the glass on the table right in front of the couch and poured himself a drink. He looked up at Ed who was watching the liquid pour out of the bottle.

"I would offer you some, but I know you don't drink."

"And how the hell would you know if I drink or not?"

"I have my ways of knowing, believe me," Roy said with a smirk, "Besides, if you think _milk _is sour, how much more would it be for your taste buds if it ever got a taste of this?"

"Shut the hell up!!" Ed shouted full force, although he was turning beet red at the mention of his dislike for milk.

Roy drank about half of the content of the glass before he proceeded, all signs of amusement gone from his face.

"So, you finally found the Philosopher's stone. What are you going to do now?"

"Bring back my brother's body, of course. I'm pretty sure I made that part quite clear throughout all the shitty missions that you sent me to."

"And you?" Roy poured himself another glass of Vodka

"What about me?"

"Your arm and your leg…aren't you going to try and get it back, too?"

Ed looked down at his lap and answered with a voice that was barely heard by Roy.

"Well, I…" he faltered for a bit, "No…no, I can't possibly get it back."

"You can't or you just won't?"

"It doesn't work like that you know! I thought even a dumb shit like you would know that! Even though I have the philosopher's stone, I'm pretty sure there's still some kind of price to pay."

Ed hesitated before continuing "…There always is."

Roy paused for a bit. The rim of his glass almost touched his lips. He looked like he wanted to say something, but he shook his head, almost as if he had thought it better to not say anything at all, and drank everything in one swig. Ed watched with disgust as Roy poured another one into the glass.

"Stop drinking, will you? I don't want you wasted away when I leave. Hawkeye told me that she'll call you later on. I don't need her breathing down my neck just because she thinks I'm the cause of your drinking binge," then Ed frowned, "besides, I promised Al that, at the very least, I would say goodbye to you."

"Please, Edward," he drank again, placing emphasis to the fact that he probably _was _already wasted, "I hardly need to be sober for goodbyes."

As a matter of fact, he did not even want to be here to say goodbye. He had already done enough of that in his lifetime. Sure, Ed and he might not have been necessarily as civil or as friendly to one another as he would have wished they were, but Ed would still be an indispensable person to his unit. Still, he knew it was a lost cause. Ed would not stay even if Riza had held him at gun point. When it comes to his brother, Ed would absolutely consider getting Al's body back even if it meant defying all the rules that were set and the consequences that they have.

"Hey, Colonel Bastard, don't space out on me again. Anyway, don't you have anything to ask me?"

"What else is there to ask?"

"Nothing much, really. I'm just surprised that you didn't ask me how I managed to get my hands on the stone."

"Out of sheer luck, I'm guessing. If it is anything but that, you're free to tell me."

Ed bit back a retort. Even if Roy acted completely nonchalant about it he knew that the Colonel indeed has his own ways of knowing. After this conversation, the Colonel would no doubt do some digging up of his own and maybe even do a little research as to how all of this would somehow connect to the Fuhrer. He would not be Mustang, otherwise.

"Are you sure there's nothing else you want to know?"

"If there was something I wanted to get from you then I would've asked sooner even without you offering it to me."

"Nothing else that you want _me _to know?"

"Edward…" Roy sighed, and for the first time that night he finally felt the fatigue setting in, "go if you must. There's no need to delay things that cannot be delayed any further."

"Why would I delay…?"

"You're scared. I know you are."

. There was resolve in the Colonel's eyes as he said those words: _"I know you are." _

_I know_ who_ you_ _are._

"You think that everything will go wrong, and that the stone will not work the way you expect it to be. Worse, you think that by the end of it all Al's soul wouldn't even be there anymore."

For the first time during the whole conversation, Roy put down the glass and the bottle of Vodka on the table. All traces of his drunkenness and disorientation were gone. Ed felt unnerved as Roy stared at him straight in the eye. He tried to look somewhere else. If there was one thing about Mustang that he hated any more than the very presence of the man himself it would be those black eyes of his. They were cold and calculating. Worse yet, if those eyes stared back straight at you, you would feel as though it saw through you, moved past the exteriors, took apart every bit of masking, and left only the most vulnerable part of your being.

"Listen, Edward. I know my words never meant that much to you, and I know that you're in a hurry, so I'll spare you the theatrics."

The blonde did not look at him directly, but Roy knew that he was listening.

"You've spent years looking for this stone in high hopes that it'll bring your brother's body back. After having sacrificed everything and after dealing with things no one of your age should deal with…Even if it doesn't go the way you plan…" Roy paused for a moment, "I just want you to know, Edward, that whatever happens this time…it's not going to be your fault."

When Ed didn't say anything, Roy took it as a signal that he can keep on going.

"I've seen the things that you've done for your brother. You might say that there is no way you could ever compensate for what you've done, but just being able to survive and last this far is enough. So whether your brother gets his body back or not, rest assured, you've already done all that you can. Whatever happens next is out of your control."

Roy did not miss it when Ed shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He did not want to be as blunt as this, but this, he thought, was something that Ed needed to hear. Perhaps that was why Ed came to his house and not to the office. In the office, all Roy could ever offer is the assurance that Ed would never have to go back to the military after all of this. In the comforts of his home, he can offer –_has offered_- the assurance that, regardless of the outcome, Ed will be forgiven.

It still confused him though. Throughout the years that Ed had been under his command, the youth had never once relied on him for encouraging words. Ed already found enough wisdom and support from the other people that he considered "family". God knows that the kid definitely never thought of Roy as family.

"You really think so?" Ed said in an uncharacteristically soft voice. He found it quite shocking when Roy smiled at him with a _real _smile. Not a smirk, not a condescending grin, but a real _smile_.

"I know so."

Roy could have sworn that he saw a flicker of gratitude (and perhaps a small smile) when Ed looked at him again. The sudden sound that came from the grandfather clock at the strike of midnight brought back the urgency of Ed's situation.

"You need to get going now, Edward."

"I know, bastard."

_Bastard…_

He had the feeling that would be the last time that he would ever hear those words come out of Ed's mouth. Whether it would be because of his or Ed's demise, it didn't really matter right now. It seemed like an eternity passed before Ed finally got up and made his way to the front door. He had his left hand on the doorknob when he looked over his shoulder.

"Hey, Colonel?"

"Yes, Edward?"

"Thank You…for saying the things that you just said to me."

Roy looked at Ed for awhile before answering "You're absolutely welcome, Fullmetal."

"Goodbye."

"Goodbye."

When Ed shut the door behind him, it brought about the sense of finality. He didn't even say "See you later, Bastard.".

_Goodbye. _

He had never said goodbye to people when he is about to hang up the phone, or when they are about to leave for a long vacation. When it comes to saying a permanent _goodbye, _he felt like it was not at all necessary to say it. Where was the sense of bidding someone _goodbye_ anyways?

What good could ever be found in farewells?

He slowly got up from the couch, and grabbed the bottle and the empty glass. Edward was on his way to fight his battle. When the sun rises, Roy would have to be prepared to fight his own battle, too. Just like Edward's situation, the outcome of the battle he would involve himself in is also something that he could not possibly predict and is, therefore, out of his hands.

Having experienced a lot through the Ishbalan war, however, somehow wrenched the idea of victory out of his mind almost immediately. He knew that no matter how much you tried and sacrificed, somehow, it is just not enough to give you what you want.

_Do you believe in equivalent exchange?_

"No, Edward. I don't."

_

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**Author's Note****: **So that's it. That's the end of it. If you guys have any comments or complaints you can just put it in the reviews.


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